https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=WikiSysop 2026-04-11T13:43:18Z User contributions MediaWiki 1.41.0 https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=460 2025-03-07T15:18:57Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> ** [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarTejas|Scholar Tejas]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[who /monster/ here?]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/who-monster-here/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Sentencing]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/sentencing/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Wightsburg, Arkansas]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/wightsburg-arkansas original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=459 2025-03-07T15:17:49Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> <br /> tesssst<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> ** [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarTejas|Scholar Tejas]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[who /monster/ here?]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/who-monster-here/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Sentencing]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/sentencing/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Wightsburg, Arkansas]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/wightsburg-arkansas original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Wightsburg,_Arkansas&diff=451 2024-11-28T08:59:43Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* Wightsburg, Arkansas */</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Wightsburg, Arkansas ==<br /> '''Recipe for Disaster'''<br /> <br /> Yield: 1 wild night in a sundown town<br /> <br /> * 1 Cause so far gone as to not be lost, but found, actually, in your heart of hearts<br /> * 21 grams of the blackest soul-essence (yours)<br /> * 3 tablespooks worth of juicy racial animus <br /> * 1½ teaspoons of grief-tears<br /> * 3 - 5 pieces of strange fruit picked ripe from the tall poplar tree in the center of town<br /> * Several moth-eaten bedsheets<br /> * 1lb of dust taken from graves in or around Wightsburg dated 1861-1865<br /> * 2 or 3 gaggles of Yankees, shot full of Northern aggression and adventurism, seeking you, the Great Witch of the South<br /> * 1 copy of the elusive ''Negro Motorist Red Book'', “a modern Malleus Maleficarum masquerading as nigger empowerment” (your words), torn to shreds<br /> <br /> '''Preparation''' <br /> <br /> ''Before the year of our Lord, Nineteen Hundred and Fifty Six''<br /> <br /> # Bake in Southern heat for two or three decades, mum and mummifying.<br /> # Stew in your own juices, marinating thoroughly in the gangrenous suffering of Antebellum battlefields, where countrymen, horses and King Cotton were hewn down by cold Northern scythes.<br /> # Come the dreary post-war time, place yourself over a fire until boiling.  Sear until hatred makes fond.  Deglaze using a stock of own blood until exsanguinated, expired.<br /> # Be swept up by Reanimation, joining undeath’s gray ranks, as the formerly-gray blossoms green, or fades yellow, swept up by Reconstruction.<br /> <br /> ''During the afternoon, on the day of the feast''<br /> <br /> # Wash bedsheets by hand in lukewarm water until free of blood.  Dry, iron and fold them.<br /> # Pick, then shuck or vivisect strange fruit.<br /> # Imbibe racial animus.<br /> <br /> ''Throughout the early evening''<br /> <br /> # Heat cauldron, occasionally stoking the flames with your Lost Cause.  <br /> # Add strong moonshine to a mixture of blood &amp; soil in the cauldron.  Simmer.  <br /> # Slowly add soul essence to concoction until it becomes reddish-black, viscous.  <br /> # Sauté strange fruit in a separate (but equal) cauldron, using scant blood sprinkled with brown sugar as a base until the fruit has caramelized.  Simmer.<br /> # Place bedsheets on a pedestal.  Run fingers through them.  Sob into them.<br /> # Pour caramelized fruit and base into the main cauldron.  Simmer.<br /> <br /> ''At dusk''<br /> <br /> # Paint your face haint blue, warning spooks that they can look but not touch.<br /> # Pour steaming contents of cauldron onto the ground beneath the pedestal until sheets rise and ambulate and clamor for righteous vengeance.<br /> # Await the arrival of Yankee witchfinders and their dusky allies.<br /> # They will be hungry (for conquest, glory and your womanhood).  <br /> # Serve Hell—hot—in portions according to each Yank’s desire until they are bloated, choked by the noose of indigestion.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Wightsburg,_Arkansas&diff=450 2024-11-28T08:57:03Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Wightsburg, Arkansas ==<br /> '''Recipe for Disaster'''<br /> <br /> Yield: 1 wild night in a sundown town<br /> <br /> * 1 Cause so far gone as to not be lost, but found, actually, in your heart of hearts<br /> * 21 grams of the blackest soul-essence (yours)<br /> * 3 tablespooks worth of juicy racial animus <br /> * 1½ teaspoons of grief-tears<br /> * 3 - 5 pieces of strange fruit picked ripe from the tall poplar tree in the center of town<br /> * Several moth-eaten bedsheets<br /> * 1lb of dust taken from graves in or around Wightsburg dated 1861-1865<br /> * 2 or 3 gaggles of Yankees, shot full of Northern aggression and adventurism, seeking you, the Great Witch of the South<br /> * 1 copy of the elusive ''Negro Motorist Red Book'', “a modern Malleus Maleficarum masquerading as nigger empowerment” (your words), torn to shreds<br /> <br /> '''Preparation''' <br /> <br /> ''Before the year of our Lord, Nineteen Hundred and Fifty Six''<br /> <br /> # Bake in Southern heat for two or three decades, mum and mummifying.<br /> <br /> # Stew in your own juices, marinating thoroughly in the gangrenous suffering of Antebellum battlefields, where countrymen, horses and King Cotton were hewn down by cold Northern scythes. <br /> <br /> # Come the dreary post-war time, place yourself over a fire until boiling.  Sear until hatred makes fond.  Deglaze using a stock of own blood until exsanguinated, expired.<br /> <br /> # Be swept up by Reanimation, joining undeath’s gray ranks, as the formerly-gray blossoms green, or fades yellow, swept up by Reconstruction.<br /> <br /> ''During the afternoon, on the day of the feast''<br /> <br /> # Wash bedsheets by hand in lukewarm water until free of blood.  Dry, iron and fold them.<br /> <br /> # Pick, then shuck or vivisect strange fruit.<br /> <br /> # Imbibe racial animus.<br /> <br /> ''Throughout the early evening''<br /> <br /> # Heat cauldron, occasionally stoking the flames with your Lost Cause.  <br /> <br /> # Add strong moonshine to a mixture of blood &amp; soil in the cauldron.  Simmer.  <br /> <br /> # Slowly add soul essence to concoction until it becomes reddish-black, viscous.  <br /> <br /> # Sauté strange fruit in a separate (but equal) cauldron, using scant blood sprinkled with brown sugar as a base until the fruit has caramelized.  Simmer.<br /> <br /> # Place bedsheets on a pedestal.  Run fingers through them.  Sob into them.<br /> <br /> # Pour caramelized fruit and base into the main cauldron.  Simmer.<br /> <br /> ''At dusk''<br /> <br /> # Paint your face haint blue, warning spooks that they can look but not touch.<br /> <br /> # Pour steaming contents of cauldron onto the ground beneath the pedestal until sheets rise and ambulate and clamor for righteous vengeance.<br /> <br /> # Await the arrival of Yankee witchfinders and their dusky allies.<br /> <br /> # They will be hungry (for conquest, glory and your womanhood).  <br /> <br /> # Serve Hell—hot—in portions according to each Yank’s desire until they are bloated, choked by the noose of indigestion.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Wightsburg,_Arkansas&diff=449 2024-11-28T08:52:12Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;== Wightsburg, Arkansas == '''Recipe for Disaster''' Yield: 1 wild night in a sundown town * 1 Cause so far gone as to not be lost, but found, actually, in your heart of hearts * 21 grams of the blackest soul-essence (yours) * 3 tablespooks worth of juicy racial animus * 1½ teaspoons of grief-tears * 3 - 5 pieces of strange fruit picked ripe from the tall poplar tree in the center of town * Several moth-eaten bedsheets * 1lb of dust taken from graves in or around Wig...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>== Wightsburg, Arkansas ==<br /> '''Recipe for Disaster'''<br /> <br /> Yield: 1 wild night in a sundown town<br /> <br /> * 1 Cause so far gone as to not be lost, but found, actually, in your heart of hearts<br /> * 21 grams of the blackest soul-essence (yours)<br /> * 3 tablespooks worth of juicy racial animus <br /> * 1½ teaspoons of grief-tears<br /> * 3 - 5 pieces of strange fruit picked ripe from the tall poplar tree in the center of town<br /> * Several moth-eaten bedsheets<br /> * 1lb of dust taken from graves in or around Wightsburg dated 1861-1865<br /> * 2 or 3 gaggles of Yankees, shot full of Northern aggression and adventurism, seeking you, the Great Witch of the South<br /> * 1 copy of the elusive ''Negro Motorist Red Book'', “a modern Malleus Maleficarum masquerading as nigger empowerment” (your words), torn to shreds<br /> <br /> '''Preparation''' <br /> <br /> ''Before the year of our Lord, Nineteen Hundred and Fifty Six''<br /> <br /> # Bake in Southern heat for two or three decades, mum and mummifying.<br /> <br /> # Stew in your own juices, marinating thoroughly in the gangrenous suffering of Antebellum battlefields, where countrymen, horses and King Cotton were hewn down by cold Northern scythes. <br /> <br /> # Come the dreary post-war time, place yourself over a fire until boiling.  Sear until hatred makes fond.  Deglaze using a stock of own blood until exsanguinated, expired.<br /> <br /> # Be swept up by Reanimation, joining undeath’s gray ranks, as the formerly-gray blossoms green, or fades yellow, swept up by Reconstruction.<br /> <br /> ''During the afternoon, on the day of the feast''<br /> <br /> # Wash bedsheets by hand in lukewarm water until free of blood.  Dry, iron and fold them.<br /> <br /> # Pick, then shuck or vivisect strange fruit.<br /> <br /> # Imbibe racial animus.<br /> <br /> ''Throughout the early evening''<br /> <br /> # Heat cauldron, occasionally stoking the flames with your Lost Cause.  <br /> <br /> # Add strong moonshine to a mixture of blood &amp; soil in the cauldron.  Simmer.  <br /> <br /> # Slowly add soul essence to concoction until it becomes reddish-black, viscous.  <br /> <br /> # Sauté strange fruit in a separate (but equal) cauldron, using scant blood sprinkled with brown sugar as a base until the fruit has caramelized.  Simmer.<br /> <br /> # Place bedsheets on a pedestal.  Run fingers through them.  Sob into them.<br /> <br /> # Pour caramelized fruit and base into the main cauldron.  Simmer.<br /> <br /> ''At dusk''<br /> <br /> # Paint your face haint blue, warning spooks that they can look but not touch.<br /> <br /> # Pour steaming contents of cauldron onto the ground beneath the pedestal until sheets rise and ambulate and clamor for righteous vengeance.<br /> <br /> # Await the arrival of Yankee witchfinders and their dusky allies.<br /> <br /> # They will be hungry (for conquest, glory and your womanhood).  <br /> <br /> # Serve Hell—hot—in portions according to each Yank’s desire until they are bloated, choked by the noose of indigestion.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=448 2024-11-28T08:50:04Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> ** [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarTejas|Scholar Tejas]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[who /monster/ here?]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/who-monster-here/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Sentencing]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/sentencing/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Wightsburg, Arkansas]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/wightsburg-arkansas original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Sentencing&diff=427 2024-11-14T01:00:40Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == Sentencing == ''A Fragment'' …on the floor everywhere now and dirty as she’s felt since Garland that everything always is dirty and leaving from home to Texas and back to home and soon enough though down the line because she’s keeping it whatever it is the child too will leave her guts and grace and him if he can get himself up to fuck enough for her to blame him and not the sky that night rolling to the corners resting in the little puddl...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Sentencing ==<br /> ''A Fragment''<br /> <br /> <br /> …on the floor everywhere now and dirty as she’s felt since Garland that everything always is dirty and leaving from home to Texas and back to home and soon enough though down the line because she’s keeping it whatever it is the child too will leave her guts and grace and him if he can get himself up to fuck enough for her to blame him and not the sky that night rolling to the corners resting in the little puddles on the floor and already dissolving in hair and schmutz and piss and none never cleaned and everything dirty because she’d said its fine when it wasn’t so it’s hands and knees now and dropping the pills that set him like nothing so much as quivering cold oatmeal in her palm white and clattering and for moment a moment a moment tipped to spill back in the bottle but not and not because there’s no way to stomach him taking the pills dirty and making him sick but on account that there’s no way to stomach him taking them at all no more anyhow in any way whatsoever since without them the transgressions in Texas with him asleep after not being able at all to complete and her finding some other one to meet the need to meet it then too much and too quickly because he might without them be he might without them the pills now flushed he might without them be able to be again firm enough to make his claim just the once and she can say see she can say see you never needed them and we can be we and another…  </div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=426 2024-11-14T00:50:59Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> <br /> [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarTejas|Scholar Tejas]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=425 2024-11-14T00:50:29Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> ** [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarTejas|Scholar Tejas]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[who /monster/ here?]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/who-monster-here/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Sentencing]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/sentencing/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=User:Scholar_BadGobbo&diff=421 2024-11-12T11:28:47Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;I'M BAD I'M BAD yOU KNOW IT!!!&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>I'M BAD<br /> <br /> I'M BAD<br /> <br /> yOU KNOW IT!!!</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=420 2024-11-12T11:28:23Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> <br /> [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=419 2024-11-12T11:28:00Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> ** [[User:Scholar BadGobbo|Scholar BadGobbo]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[who /monster/ here?]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/who-monster-here/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Who_/monster/_here%3F&diff=418 2024-11-12T11:17:28Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == who /monster/ here? ==<br /> &gt;tfw bored as fuck on the night shift at the World Star Museum<br /> &gt;hands folded across my chest<br /> &gt;straight up eroding with boredom<br /> &gt;other guard here, fat 24 year old darkie, is telling stories to keep occupied<br /> &gt;most are bullshit<br /> &gt;funniest example is him saying someone named “Indiana Jones” broke in and tried to steal some remains<br /> &gt;he says he clocked the guy and was employee of the month, parking space and everything<br /> &gt;says all this between popping THC gummies <br /> &gt;recounts how he couldn't taze Jones because he had a long ass bullwhip<br /> &gt;lmao who carries a bullwhip?<br /> &gt;couldn't move into taser range so he &quot;did a backflip and landed behind him&quot;<br /> &gt;fucking retarded story<br /> &gt;even as a transfer i know it’s bs<br /> &gt;starts talking about his &quot;girlfriend&quot;<br /> &gt;obvious he's talking about the petrified dryad on level 2<br /> &gt;just keeps repeating “petrified sluts give me wood” and “scaring the hoes”<br /> &gt;she died millenia ago<br /> &gt;she isn't his girlfriend<br /> &gt;she looks like she was old af before petrification<br /> &gt;he's a young guy<br /> &gt;gerontophile freak<br /> &gt;fuck this moron<br /> &gt;dude starts mocking how i'm standing<br /> &gt;saying &quot;Wakanda Forever&quot; and other stupid shit<br /> &gt;i'm a goblin, not a nigger<br /> &gt;i want to slap him bad<br /> &gt;he takes out his taser and is waving it around at random shit<br /> &gt;careless af<br /> &gt;disrespectful to do that in a museum<br /> &gt;disrespectful (and dumb) to do that anywhere<br /> &gt;bad trigger discipline<br /> &gt;he starts going off about his home life<br /> &gt;mortgage totally underwater<br /> &gt;seriously, some Atlantis shit<br /> &gt;divorced (his fault)<br /> &gt;totally unhappy with life<br /> &gt;8 kids<br /> &gt;by this point i don't give a shit at all<br /> &gt;he starts talking about stealing from one of the exhibits, the severed head of a chief<br /> &gt;pops another edible<br /> &gt;he's probably really high rn<br /> &gt;says &quot;i bet i could take a piece of its ear&quot;<br /> &gt;”it’s just a little piece who would notice?”<br /> &gt;&quot;who gives a shit about some dead greenback anyway?&quot;<br /> &gt;he’s like &quot;i bet no one would even raise an eyebrow&quot;<br /> &gt;i bet they would<br /> &gt;raise my eyebrow<br /> &gt;this totally exhausts me because I'm not fully awake yet<br /> &gt;he rubs his eyes <br /> &gt;edible hitting hard, huh bro?<br /> &gt;”motherfuck” he says<br /> &gt;starts doing a rap<br /> &gt;something about &quot;gettin mad greenbacks for a greenback&quot;<br /> &gt;something about &quot;gettin head from a greenback&quot;<br /> &gt;he's not a even good rapper<br /> &gt;a few minutes later i see him going into the control booth<br /> &gt;he comes back and says &quot;i just turned off the cameras&quot; and does a little floss dance<br /> &gt;he leaves again<br /> &gt;comes back with display case master keys<br /> &gt;i can hear him working on the head exhibit in the other room<br /> &gt;is this guy for fucking real?<br /> &gt;wonder if he turned off the alarms too<br /> &gt;alarm sounds<br /> &gt;he didn't<br /> &gt;fucking idiot<br /> &gt;he comes back covered in sweat<br /> &gt;totally freaking out<br /> &gt;head in his hands<br /> &gt;alarm lights strobing<br /> &gt;sound of the alarm is like a rap beat<br /> &gt;boooaah whump, booooah whump<br /> &gt;my foot starts to tap to the beat<br /> &gt;then my legs wobble<br /> &gt;boooah whump<br /> &gt;hips shake a bit<br /> &gt;boooah whump<br /> &gt;dust from eons-old rags is flying everywhere<br /> &gt;mind fog is lessening <br /> &gt;atrophy is lessening <br /> &gt;heart full of rage<br /> &gt;my body is ready <br /> &gt;he starts coughing and blinking his eyes<br /> &gt;he's saying &quot;holy shit, holy shit&quot;<br /> &gt;he's like &quot;no way man, no way&quot;<br /> &gt;fucking full-force CHUCKS the weed gummies across the room into a wall<br /> &gt;he’s trying to calm down and think but can’t<br /> &gt;winds up pissing himself<br /> &gt;other exhibits are waking up too<br /> &gt;i’m trying to think of something frightening to say<br /> &gt;wind up going with &quot;I AM A KING OF OLD. DO YOU THINK I REGARD YOU AS ANYTHING BUT AN EXPENDABLE PEON?&quot;<br /> &gt;his pants are soaked<br /> &gt;every exhibit, even the taxidermied beavers, are now fully awake seeing this<br /> &gt;all eyes on him like he's Tupac<br /> &gt;boooah whump<br /> &gt;dude backs up to the wall and makes the sign of the cross<br /> &gt;lol lmao<br /> &gt;approach him quicker than he expects<br /> &gt;this ain’t no romero, son<br /> &gt;he tries to go for taser<br /> &gt;beaver pulls it out of the holster and bites it in half<br /> &gt;wouldn't do shit anyway <br /> &gt;strangle him with my rags<br /> &gt;life flows out of his body<br /> &gt;i feel good<br /> &gt;James Brown except green instead of brown<br /> &gt;walk back to my open sarcophagus<br /> &gt;stand there while police storm building<br /> &gt;detective turns off alarm<br /> &gt;want to laugh but can't anymore<br /> &gt;sergeant sees the blood on my hands and wrappings<br /> &gt;doesn't care<br /> &gt;they wheel dude's body out<br /> &gt;he goes to a morgue somewhere<br /> &gt;probably one in the bad part of town<br /> &gt;who gives a shit<br /> &gt;janitors sweep up the dust<br /> &gt;ashes 2 ashes<br /> &gt;article about his death will quote museum burglary statistics<br /> &gt;higher each year, like human museum guards<br /> &gt;hire another one<br /> &gt;yawn<br /> &gt;love necrosecurity<br /> <br /> [https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/23107248/#23107248 /monster/]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Who_/monster/_here%3F&diff=417 2024-11-12T11:16:54Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;== who /monster/ here? == &gt;tfw bored as fuck on the night shift at the World Star Museum &gt;hands folded across my chest &gt;straight up eroding with boredom &gt;other guard here, fat 24 year old darkie, is telling stories to keep occupied &gt;most are bullshit &gt;funniest example is him saying someone named “Indiana Jones” broke in and tried to steal some remains &gt;he says he clocked the guy and was employee of the month, parking space and everything &gt;says all this betwee...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>== who /monster/ here? ==<br /> &gt;tfw bored as fuck on the night shift at the World Star Museum<br /> &gt;hands folded across my chest<br /> &gt;straight up eroding with boredom<br /> &gt;other guard here, fat 24 year old darkie, is telling stories to keep occupied<br /> &gt;most are bullshit<br /> &gt;funniest example is him saying someone named “Indiana Jones” broke in and tried to steal some remains<br /> &gt;he says he clocked the guy and was employee of the month, parking space and everything<br /> &gt;says all this between popping THC gummies <br /> &gt;recounts how he couldn't taze Jones because he had a long ass bullwhip<br /> &gt;lmao who carries a bullwhip?<br /> &gt;couldn't move into taser range so he &quot;did a backflip and landed behind him&quot;<br /> &gt;fucking retarded story<br /> &gt;even as a transfer i know it’s bs<br /> &gt;starts talking about his &quot;girlfriend&quot;<br /> &gt;obvious he's talking about the petrified dryad on level 2<br /> &gt;just keeps repeating “petrified sluts give me wood” and “scaring the hoes”<br /> &gt;she died millenia ago<br /> &gt;she isn't his girlfriend<br /> &gt;she looks like she was old af before petrification<br /> &gt;he's a young guy<br /> &gt;gerontophile freak<br /> &gt;fuck this moron<br /> &gt;dude starts mocking how i'm standing<br /> &gt;saying &quot;Wakanda Forever&quot; and other stupid shit<br /> &gt;i'm a goblin, not a nigger<br /> &gt;i want to slap him bad<br /> &gt;he takes out his taser and is waving it around at random shit<br /> &gt;careless af<br /> &gt;disrespectful to do that in a museum<br /> &gt;disrespectful (and dumb) to do that anywhere<br /> &gt;bad trigger discipline<br /> &gt;he starts going off about his home life<br /> &gt;mortgage totally underwater<br /> &gt;seriously, some Atlantis shit<br /> &gt;divorced (his fault)<br /> &gt;totally unhappy with life<br /> &gt;8 kids<br /> &gt;by this point i don't give a shit at all<br /> &gt;he starts talking about stealing from one of the exhibits, the severed head of a chief<br /> &gt;pops another edible<br /> &gt;he's probably really high rn<br /> &gt;says &quot;i bet i could take a piece of its ear&quot;<br /> &gt;”it’s just a little piece who would notice?”<br /> &gt;&quot;who gives a shit about some dead greenback anyway?&quot;<br /> &gt;he’s like &quot;i bet no one would even raise an eyebrow&quot;<br /> &gt;i bet they would<br /> &gt;raise my eyebrow<br /> &gt;this totally exhausts me because I'm not fully awake yet<br /> &gt;he rubs his eyes <br /> &gt;edible hitting hard, huh bro?<br /> &gt;”motherfuck” he says<br /> &gt;starts doing a rap<br /> &gt;something about &quot;gettin mad greenbacks for a greenback&quot;<br /> &gt;something about &quot;gettin head from a greenback&quot;<br /> &gt;he's not a even good rapper<br /> &gt;a few minutes later i see him going into the control booth<br /> &gt;he comes back and says &quot;i just turned off the cameras&quot; and does a little floss dance<br /> &gt;he leaves again<br /> &gt;comes back with display case master keys<br /> &gt;i can hear him working on the head exhibit in the other room<br /> &gt;is this guy for fucking real?<br /> &gt;wonder if he turned off the alarms too<br /> &gt;alarm sounds<br /> &gt;he didn't<br /> &gt;fucking idiot<br /> &gt;he comes back covered in sweat<br /> &gt;totally freaking out<br /> &gt;head in his hands<br /> &gt;alarm lights strobing<br /> &gt;sound of the alarm is like a rap beat<br /> &gt;boooaah whump, booooah whump<br /> &gt;my foot starts to tap to the beat<br /> &gt;then my legs wobble<br /> &gt;boooah whump<br /> &gt;hips shake a bit<br /> &gt;boooah whump<br /> &gt;dust from eons-old rags is flying everywhere<br /> &gt;mind fog is lessening <br /> &gt;atrophy is lessening <br /> &gt;heart full of rage<br /> &gt;my body is ready <br /> &gt;he starts coughing and blinking his eyes<br /> &gt;he's saying &quot;holy shit, holy shit&quot;<br /> &gt;he's like &quot;no way man, no way&quot;<br /> &gt;fucking full-force CHUCKS the weed gummies across the room into a wall<br /> &gt;he’s trying to calm down and think but can’t<br /> &gt;winds up pissing himself<br /> &gt;other exhibits are waking up too<br /> &gt;i’m trying to think of something frightening to say<br /> &gt;wind up going with &quot;I AM A KING OF OLD. DO YOU THINK I REGARD YOU AS ANYTHING BUT AN EXPENDABLE PEON?&quot;<br /> &gt;his pants are soaked<br /> &gt;every exhibit, even the taxidermied beavers, are now fully awake seeing this<br /> &gt;all eyes on him like he's Tupac<br /> &gt;boooah whump<br /> &gt;dude backs up to the wall and makes the sign of the cross<br /> &gt;lol lmao<br /> &gt;approach him quicker than he expects<br /> &gt;this ain’t no romero, son<br /> &gt;he tries to go for taser<br /> &gt;beaver pulls it out of the holster and bites it in half<br /> &gt;wouldn't do shit anyway <br /> &gt;strangle him with my rags<br /> &gt;life flows out of his body<br /> &gt;i feel good<br /> &gt;James Brown except green instead of brown<br /> &gt;walk back to my open sarcophagus<br /> &gt;stand there while police storm building<br /> &gt;detective turns off alarm<br /> &gt;want to laugh but can't anymore<br /> &gt;sergeant sees the blood on my hands and wrappings<br /> &gt;doesn't care<br /> &gt;they wheel dude's body out<br /> &gt;he goes to a morgue somewhere<br /> &gt;probably one in the bad part of town<br /> &gt;who gives a shit<br /> &gt;janitors sweep up the dust<br /> &gt;ashes 2 ashes<br /> &gt;article about his death will quote museum burglary statistics<br /> &gt;higher each year, like human museum guards<br /> &gt;hire another one<br /> &gt;yawn<br /> &gt;love necrosecurity<br /> <br /> [https://desuarchive.org/r9k/thread/23107248/#23107248 /monster/]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=416 2024-11-12T11:15:17Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> <br /> Scholar BadGobbo</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=415 2024-11-12T11:14:51Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> ** Scholar BadGobbo<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[who /monster/ here?]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/who-monster-here/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=401 2024-09-12T15:05:53Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=400 2024-09-12T15:05:41Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarMock|Scholar Mock]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=The_Mock_Angel&diff=399 2024-09-12T14:50:45Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == The Mock Angel ==<br /> I don’t care anymore…<br /> I don’t want to be a mother or a fucktoy… your voice echoed<br /> Like a piano falling down stairs… you said<br /> I am just a young girl… I want love for my own<br /> <br /> Oh… I said… Shattered like a plate…<br /> <br /> There is such a black hole in me… That must swallow<br /> A bear trap… Must eat<br /> The oyster shell of my heart… Covered in claw marks… Open! You cunt!<br /> There was supposed to be a pearl here… No<br /> Just horrible fucking black sludge<br /> I drip down the sides of the tiles like a… Pathetic ribbon<br /> A discarded gift… Retreating to the edge of the earth<br /> <br /> I cannot spare myself for somebody else…<br /> If you won’t have me, I’ll be somebody else!<br /> I could be a romantic clown or perhaps a beggar<br /> Prying your wings apart and cumming down the middle…<br /> I could lick your calluses, I could surgically attach your clit! To my upper lip!<br /> I could be a razor blade for a cock… If only you really loved me…<br /> I would be a wildebeest for your weather of love<br /> You could turn me into a feather… If only you straddled my chainsaw…<br /> <br /> Alas, I am a disgusting thing<br /> A self hating urchin, peeling himself off his comfortable rock…<br /> To evolve into a frightening manner of limbs…<br /> How could you? From the comfort of your bed… Ever understand?<br /> How it feels on the black sands… Infinite distorted guitars… <br /> Train sounds… Foxes fucking…<br /> My life… A footnote in the evolution of puny animals<br /> You should pee on me… <br /> Then dash my brains with a large stick<br /> <br /> I am of microscopic importance…<br /> I am better than God…<br /> I can be rock music for you… My dear<br /> I will wet your bangs… I shiver<br /> I will transform!<br /> <br /> With my teeth… I tear all of the birds apart!<br /> I adorn my back with makeshift wings<br /> I catch fish with my hands… Their vomit slicks my hair back<br /> I’m clean in the salt water… But my cock bursts with fright <br /> And in the night time… Skulking past neon <br /> Stinking of sexual aerosol… I leak into the shadows…<br /> Who will accompany your gentle… Silent… Perfect sleep…<br /> Me… Me… Me… I look like your one true lover… Somebody…<br /> You deserve…<br /> <br /> *<br /> <br /> My language is unrefined… So I speak not a lot… Only a hiss<br /> And you wake!<br /> Your ears are folded from your slumber… Your eyes are wet<br /> With a dream? Of me? I could unravel at the thought!<br /> I entice your gorgeousness out…<br /> Like a worm to the rain… Be mine… <br /> Who are you? You stammering s…s…s… Saint of my heart…<br /> I am an angel… Here to deliver a divine message…<br /> But your wings are black! <br /> Nevermind… That is just the death I have traveled through…<br /> Quite the perfume… You say… Your mouth agape and awaiting…<br /> You must go to him… The plain boy you have killed slowly…<br /> And offer him your first… Your last… Your whole love…<br /> But which boy! I have saved myself many times… <br /> For the pure love of life… Must I surrender this?<br /> Yes… I say… As an angel…. Or I’ll fucking kill you or whatever… <br /> <br /> And with my message delivered… My teenage angst caught flight!<br /> I became an acne scar on the back of the sky!<br /> No shame… No guilt… I am a deceiver… You are the receiver!<br /> The passenger of my passion… Oh how I’ll treat you so well…<br /> My darling… My little raccoon… With your cookie heart… <br /> My forever comedown… My life machine… <br /> The spring in my heart that saves me from falling into the spirit ditch!<br /> Don’t discard me… To the nothingness I deserve…<br /> <br /> The morning returns and wipes away the debt…<br /> The horizon is not an ass crack but something… Adorable <br /> I feel a sense of renewal… <br /> I don’t want to hurt animals anymore…<br /> I awake from the cliff face… And the penis! Of my soul!<br /> Is always erect!<br /> I dash into town… I don’t care about my upside-down face anymore!<br /> I am as pretty as can be… The recipient of your futuristic touch…<br /> Nail polish in my mouth… Utopia!<br /> To your home… I knock once… Twice… Three times…<br /> But the door is not locked to me… Or anyone…<br /> I push it open like an embarrassed breeze… <br /> You are swinging from the ceiling…<br /> Completely blue… I buckle into myself… <br /> With a powerful need to be harmed… <br /> I grab nothing and everything at once…<br /> And I cry upon a single black feather…<br /> The feather of my cruelty.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=The_Mock_Angel&diff=398 2024-09-12T14:49:45Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;== The Mock Angel == I don’t care anymore… I don’t want to be a mother or a fucktoy… your voice echoed Like a piano falling down stairs… you said I am just a young girl… I want love for my own Oh… I said… Shattered like a plate… There is such a black hole in me… That must swallow A bear trap… Must eat The oyster shell of my heart… Covered in claw marks… Open! You cunt! There was supposed to be a pearl here… No Just horrible fucki...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>== The Mock Angel ==<br /> I don’t care anymore…<br /> I don’t want to be a mother or a fucktoy… your voice echoed<br /> Like a piano falling down stairs… you said<br /> I am just a young girl… I want love for my own<br /> <br /> Oh… I said… Shattered like a plate…<br /> <br /> There is such a black hole in me… That must swallow<br /> A bear trap… Must eat<br /> The oyster shell of my heart… Covered in claw marks… Open! You cunt!<br /> There was supposed to be a pearl here… No<br /> Just horrible fucking black sludge<br /> I drip down the sides of the tiles like a… Pathetic ribbon<br /> A discarded gift… Retreating to the edge of the earth<br /> <br /> I cannot spare myself for somebody else…<br /> If you won’t have me, I’ll be somebody else!<br /> I could be a romantic clown or perhaps a beggar<br /> Prying your wings apart and cumming down the middle…<br /> I could lick your calluses, I could surgically attach your clit! To my upper lip!<br /> I could be a razor blade for a cock… If only you really loved me…<br /> I would be a wildebeest for your weather of love<br /> You could turn me into a feather… If only you straddled my chainsaw…<br /> <br /> Alas, I am a disgusting thing<br /> A self hating urchin, peeling himself off his comfortable rock…<br /> To evolve into a frightening manner of limbs…<br /> How could you? From the comfort of your bed… Ever understand?<br /> How it feels on the black sands… Infinite distorted guitars… <br /> Train sounds… Foxes fucking…<br /> My life… A footnote in the evolution of puny animals<br /> You should pee on me… <br /> Then dash my brains with a large stick<br /> <br /> I am of microscopic importance…<br /> I am better than God…<br /> I can be rock music for you… My dear<br /> I will wet your bangs… I shiver<br /> I will transform!<br /> <br /> With my teeth… I tear all of the birds apart!<br /> I adorn my back with makeshift wings<br /> I catch fish with my hands… Their vomit slicks my hair back<br /> I’m clean in the salt water… But my cock bursts with fright <br /> And in the night time… Skulking past neon <br /> Stinking of sexual aerosol… I leak into the shadows…<br /> Who will accompany your gentle… Silent… Perfect sleep…<br /> Me… Me… Me… I look like your one true lover… Somebody…<br /> You deserve…<br /> <br /> *<br /> <br /> My language is unrefined… So I speak not a lot… Only a hiss<br /> And you wake!<br /> Your ears are folded from your slumber… Your eyes are wet<br /> With a dream? Of me? I could unravel at the thought!<br /> I entice your gorgeousness out…<br /> Like a worm to the rain… Be mine… <br /> Who are you? You stammering s…s…s… Saint of my heart…<br /> I am an angel… Here to deliver a divine message…<br /> But your wings are black! <br /> Nevermind… That is just the death I have traveled through…<br /> Quite the perfume… You say… Your mouth agape and awaiting…<br /> You must go to him… The plain boy you have killed slowly…<br /> And offer him your first… Your last… Your whole love…<br /> But which boy! I have saved myself many times… <br /> For the pure love of life… Must I surrender this?<br /> Yes… I say… As an angel…. Or I’ll fucking kill you or whatever… <br /> <br /> And with my message delivered… My teenage angst caught flight!<br /> I became an acne scar on the back of the sky!<br /> No shame… No guilt… I am a deceiver… You are the receiver!<br /> The passenger of my passion… Oh how I’ll treat you so well…<br /> My darling… My little raccoon… With your cookie heart… <br /> My forever comedown… My life machine… <br /> The spring in my heart that saves me from falling into the spirit ditch!<br /> Don’t discard me… To the nothingness I deserve…<br /> <br /> The morning returns and wipes away the debt…<br /> The horizon is not an ass crack but something… Adorable <br /> I feel a sense of renewal… <br /> I don’t want to hurt animals anymore…<br /> I awake from the cliff face… And the penis! Of my soul!<br /> Is always erect!<br /> I dash into town… I don’t care about my upside-down face anymore!<br /> I am as pretty as can be… The recipient of your futuristic touch…<br /> Nail polish in my mouth… Utopia!<br /> To your home… I knock once… Twice… Three times…<br /> But the door is not locked to me… Or anyone…<br /> I push it open like an embarrassed breeze… <br /> You are swinging from the ceiling…<br /> Completely blue… I buckle into myself… <br /> With a powerful need to be harmed… <br /> I grab nothing and everything at once…<br /> And I cry upon a single black feather…<br /> The feather of my cruelty.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=397 2024-09-12T14:49:03Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> ** Scholar Mock<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Mock Angel]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-mock-angel original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Journeying_to_America&diff=381 2024-09-05T14:10:55Z

<p>WikiSysop: Reverted edit by ScholarHeart (talk) to last revision by ScholarGobbo</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Journeying to America ==<br /> The next afternoon you appeared with Hua as guest contestants on the “The People’s Republic’s Got Talent” television show with star host Wink Chang. Since you were sixty-two and exhausted from sex, you and Hua found yourselves relegated to the senior citizen version of the show, immensely popular with the Mainland’s aging population. Hua promised to “chew ground glass,” a local expression meaning “to be with child,” should you two win the jackpot of 40,0000 renminbi on the show. You are overjoyed but skeptical, as her pregnancy would defy the one-child policy you still cleaved to. There was that son you had by a woman in Yangshuo Town that Dua didn’t know about, after all.<br /> <br /> As longtime fans of Chinese opera, you informed Wink that you would display your talent by singing three songs as a duet: “The Internationale,” the theme from ''Lady Wang Zhaojun'', and an ancient folk song entitled “The Latent Bee,” recently recorded by [[Taylor Swift]].<br /> <br /> Your rendition of “The Latent Bee” went like this:<br /> <br /> ''The latent bee''<br /> <br /> ''Will stingeth thee''<br /> <br /> ''Where thou least expect it to be''.<br /> <br /> You and Hua garbled the words but performed movingly, and the elderly studio audience erupted in class solidarity. Pocketing her half of the 40,000 prize, Hua told you she was off to college in the U.S. under Beijing’s “No Limits Partnership” with Pane Community College in Arizona, where she would study body sculpting and food engineering You told her you would meet her there later but had something important to do first: you needed to replace your vital organs with harvested younger ones, thereby transforming yourself into a Western-style college freshman complete with an eighteen-year-old body and fluency in English.<br /> <br /> A year later, your wallet flattened by the costly operation, you were admitted as a freshman to Pane Community College under the Belt and [[Road]] and Textbook Initiative. Saying goodbye to your corn-raising relatives, you left Jilin Province to catch up with Hua, reaching Pane Community College in a scrub-covered field in Arizona after crossing the porous southern border from Mexico. You were excited not only to see Hua once more, but a web search had returned titillating information on the college. The school described itself as one with a strong social conscience, which you interpreted as “party school,” and the official handbook online showed Pane girls with bangs and pierced ears having fun, right up your breezeway.<br /> <br /> The website gals looked thin when viewed from the side, skinny as posters, and you were delighted. You disdained the typical thick American type, humorously called “pawgs.” Hua was never thin enough for you, as her breasts often exceeded several inches in length during her monthlies. Yet overall she was ribbon-thin. Her great-grandparents had lived through the Cultural Revolution of 1966-1976, and along with many residents of Shaanxi Province, they had dieted. Hua had inherited their thinness, and her limbs resembled filaments of straw, the way you liked.<br /> <br /> But to your disappointment, you were assigned to a dorm dedicated to foreign students and others from beyond America’s borders—solid, beefy students from Kenya, Ethiopia, Bangladesh, and Germany. Not only were the students outsize, this was not the fun-filled residence the slim Pane kids occupied in the handbook, either. To start with, you couldn’t locate your room in this dormitory for foreigners, a crumbling, three-story building that resembled a derelict hotel in Daoxiang Village. There was a diner and a barber shop out front, and the stench of garbage and gravy extended to the interior, where a corpulent individual pointed you toward a halting and creaking elevator like a bored bellhop.<br /> <br /> Worse than that, after disembarking on the third floor with your wheeled trunk in tow, you found yourself in near total darkness with no light switch to reveal room #303, your destination.<br /> <br /> Stumbling around in the oppressive and smelly dark, which your phone flashlight failed to pierce, you found no rooms or doors, but kept brushing against what felt like a filthy stage curtain that descended from the ceiling somewhere above your head. Was it possible room #303 was a kind of tent and this foul curtain its lining? After thirty minutes of searching, and finding only some porky guys who refused to give you directions, you managed to return to the elevator and leave this dreadful place.<br /> <br /> Your next order of business was to put in for a change of room. Pulling your wheeled trunk down a narrow main street, you proceeded to the Housing Office. This lay within the only building on campus, a small wood and glass structure that resembled a rural post office back home, standing as it did in a field of grass and brush dried out and singed by the sun or maybe a [[fire]]. You observed a number of young people outdoors, of medium build like you, but they seemed in a hurry, and you didn’t try to talk to them.<br /> <br /> You also noticed a lot of paper silhouettes propped up on the grass and along the street that you hadn’t seen earlier, as if they had just come out of hiding. The silhouettes, shaped like human figures, stood only a few feet high, and waved in the warm morning breeze. Likely the silhouettes were suspended from thin wires, since they didn’t blow away, and were advertisements or games of some sort. You got close enough to a group of them to stare and wonder, and thought you heard whispering, but you entered the building without stopping to listen.<br /> <br /> No one was inside, but the walls were banked floor to ceiling with locked mailboxes, and the space marked Housing Office was a simple slot in the wall. A small table held pen and paper, and you wrote a note stating that, although you were from China, you wished to reside with native Americans, to have the full college experience.<br /> <br /> Scarcely had you slipped the paper into the slot than your phone pinged, and you read a text that you had been reassigned to dorm #4 within the campus building, the only building there was, and notifying you to use your phone for future communications with the Housing Office, as the mail drop was now out of service.<br /> <br /> Dorm #4 was several paces down the hall, and similarly vacant, though a good deal more spacious than the slot of the Housing Office. Here stood wooden bookshelves and a large wooden display rack of periodicals, like the magazine section at any public library. There was also a small reading table in the center of the well-lighted room, with two small chairs and two computers, and a foldable futon open on the glossy wooden floor.<br /> <br /> Seeing no signs of prior ownership, and thinking it must have been spread out for you, you wheeled your trunk over by the futon and took possession of it. Tired from your long journey across ocean and desert, you lay down on the flexible mattress and wondered where your dormmates might be. It seemed so strange to be by yourself. Were you supposed to be at some orientation function for new arrivals? You didn’t think so, and your classes didn’t start until tomorrow, so where was everybody?<br /> <br /> You began to feel drowsy, and only now did you notice that several of the silhouettes had gathered near you on the floor. You noticed more silhouettes, or pages as you thought of them, standing on the computer table, bending back and forth in an artful way. You heard the faint rustling of paper, and then weak voices that might have come from far down the hall, but were quite near to you. The speakers, and it must have been these pages, seemed to have no wind in their lungs, and you strained to make out their words. But for that you needed a microphone, or maybe a stethoscope.<br /> <br /> One or two of the short paper dolls, which the silhouettes resembled, seemed very excited over your presence, and when they twisted this way and that, you saw that they were two-dimensional, having almost no depth to their sides. From the front they appeared to be people your own age, eighteen years or surgically rejuvenated like you, guys and girls mingled together, only flattened out like prints. Their backs, however, showed gray blanks.<br /> <br /> Looking up from your recumbent position on the futon, You saw that one of the paper silhouettes had drifted right beside you, and on it you saw the bangs and pierced ears of a smiling girl, reminding you of the sweet chicks in the college handbook online. Her smile held steady as a photograph, and you smiled back at her. Still, you weren’t sure if she and the others were indignant about your encroaching on their dorm or were overjoyed to see you, since her smile might mean anything.<br /> <br /> Before you could explain that someone else had set your futon here, the young woman, if that’s what she was, beckoned to you by bending her page in a come-hither motion. She then led you out of the room, floating before you. Perhaps she spoke to you also, but her voice was too tiny for you to hear. Folded-up futon and trunk handle in hand, you followed her.<br /> <br /> She led you along a hallway lined with shelves piled high with magazines, pamphlets, and folders. Here too there was a great rustling of pages, and the sound of distant voices that never drew near. Moreover, a cloud of dust, grayish as if from the pages and spines of old books, swirled through the [[air]]. Bright bodies pulsed within the gray cloud, like the rapidly flipped pages of a colorful magazine. “Interesting place,” you said in English as you followed the floating page along the lengthy hall. If she heard you, she gave no sign.<br /> <br /> She halted at a spot where the shelves were nearly empty of folders, and the air was clear of dust and flashing images. It was quiet here too, and a light came on against the dimness. A door closed also, granting you and the girl complete privacy.<br /> <br /> As if wafted by a breeze, the page sailed up to the shelf beside a folder that lay alone, one with a red felt cover secured by a flimsy heart-shaped lock and labeled “Hua—Do Not Enter.” She then retrieved, from somewhere on her person, a key as thin as foil. She placed it within the lock for you to turn, and drifted back to the floor, standing with her bottom edge against the futon you had laid there. The page trembled a bit, perhaps in anticipation, and then folded herself to sit down, her thin wire spine flexing.<br /> <br /> “Hua?” you said, the truth of the matter becoming manifest to you. “Can this be you? How you have changed in America!”<br /> <br /> She was silent, and you smiled your old smile. “Well, Hua, I’m coming in,” you said, opening the delicate lock and lifting the folder down to the futon. You sat beside her and opened the file so both of you could look into it, as that seemed to accord with her wishes.<br /> <br /> You thumbed through the pages, each the size of her, and saw baby girl and little girl pictures at the front, these giving way to adolescent and high school shots, some verging on the risqué and showing the young woman Hua scantily clad, reminding you of a lingerie catalog. It was as if each page was an earlier version of Hua, and all the slices of her life were bound together, with more to come.<br /> <br /> Toward the end of the file her handwritten diary began, and on the last completed page of this you read, “Off to college in America! So excited! Who knows who I’ll meet? Plan to let a boy stamp my envelope at the frosh mixer.” A scrawl in a different hand followed, saying, “Great time at the mixer, Hua,” and was signed, “Dan.”<br /> <br /> Since the frosh mixer in question had taken place a year ago, who knew what had happened between Hua and Dan? And why was there no mention of you, as one Hua sorely missed and pined for? Promising yourself that if there were other mixers, you wouldn’t miss a one of them, you turned the page and discovered a wrapped condom inserted there. Glancing at Hua, you saw the page shimmying. You tore open the wrapper and found the usual device for men, except it wasn’t tipped with a nipple or a tickler, but an odd paper cap that trailed off into fine tendrils like springtime wheat in Shandong Province. Hua was now rippling, and when you finished a tiny wet spot remained on her page.<br /> <br /> You continued to stare at the page, and as the damp stain dried before your eyes, handwriting appeared under it without the intervention of a hand or pen, forming round, girlish letters. You read the words as they flowed across the page: “A great time, babe! Maybe I’ll see you again!—Hua.”<br /> <br /> “But Hua!” you cried out to the page, “don’t you recognize me? We once walked arm-in-arm together on Fragrant Bay Bridge.” But Hua promptly burst into flames, her edges turning black and curling, though there was no evident fire-starter. Had she flicked your cigarette lighter with her papery hands? But the lighter was safely tucked away in your trunk, you were sure of that. Had she brushed against an electrical source or heater? You saw no such hazard. Still, Hua was consumed by the sudden blaze as she fled to the door and slipped under it, fine ash falling from her wire spine to the floor. The only part of her that passed under the door was that filament-like spine, heated red hot.<br /> <br /> You rushed to open the door, and found many pages on fire along the hall and around the computer and bookshelves, combusting to ash in moments as they waved back and forth. The scene reminded you of the Torch Festival at home, where a breeze stirred the burning leaves of a bonfire to char and smoke. At home too there had been a barely audible chorus of the perishing as they crackled and hissed. You wondered now if those fallen leaves had still been alive, though they had dropped from trees days or weeks before they burned, and already should have been dead.<br /> <br /> Then—what heat seared you!—the bookshelves loaded with folders lit up, but there were no smoke alarms, no extinguishers, no firemen. Was the community college built to burn? In a panic you ran from the building, the cries of the pages filling your ears, to a blazing field outside. “[[Water]]!” you cried into the fire, but there came no answer.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=376 2024-09-03T12:13:25Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=375 2024-09-03T12:13:07Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPop|Scholar Pop]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Josie&diff=374 2024-09-03T12:06:29Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == '''JOSIE''' == The last time I drank red wine a telephone pole jumped in front of my car. No one believed me that the telephone pole moved. Everyone thought I had drunkenly crashed my Subaru. I was on a trip when this happened. I don’t go on trips anymore. I sit in silence. I have a theory about silence. It makes everything better. I’m not into books because reading too much is what made my mom lose her mind. She was obsessed with Victorian...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == '''JOSIE''' ==<br /> The last time I drank red wine a telephone pole jumped in front of my car. No one believed me that the telephone pole moved. Everyone thought I had drunkenly crashed my Subaru. I was on a trip when this happened. I don’t go on trips anymore. I sit in silence. I have a theory about silence. It makes everything better. <br /> <br /> I’m not into books because reading too much is what made my mom lose her mind. She was obsessed with Victorian era England. It started with Austen and went to Bronte and went to Dickens and ended up in the history of women’s rights and the suffragette movement of the 20s. I’m named after Josephine Butler. No one knows who Josephine Butler is. I go by Josie, because that’s what my dad called me when I was a kid, a tender kid, a shy thinker. Shy thinkers get infantilized by having -ie put on the back end of their names. <br /> <br /> ''Josie'' backfired in 2001 when I was 8 years old. The movie ''Josie and the Pussycats'' was released and I heard nonsense references whenever my name was said. It stopped for a while in the 2010s. But was back in full force in the 2020s, when it seemed that nostalgia was all that the people of my generation had. <br /> <br /> For a while I speed dated. But now I only slow date. I send a prospective lover one word a day for as long as it lasts. They either ignore me. Or all of the words add up. Into a sentence. And then a paragraph. And then a direct address love letter. And we agree to meet at the top of a mountain, each taking a different route. Our tongues meet and our spit is warm and burns like hell. I’ll know it’s right, that the slow dating has worked, when we both decide to take the same hike back, all the way down to the bottom.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=373 2024-09-03T12:05:52Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> ** Scholar Pop<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[Josie]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/josie original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=363 2024-08-29T15:31:55Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=362 2024-08-29T15:31:35Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarKnickerbocker|Scholar Knickerbocker]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=361 2024-08-29T15:21:30Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* EDITING THIS WIKI */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** Scholar Knickerbocker<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/venerable-conrad-knickerbocker/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Venerable_Conrad_Knickerbocker&diff=360 2024-08-29T15:20:36Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker == Man in his 70s dead: He died while vaulting with a racing tractor outside Edvöks: “Dressed sharply,” a family member said Man dead: Died in a motorcycle accident in central Evan Kinds: “A bike he’d hired until tomorrow,” the rental company said Lumberjack died after being knocked down by a timber truck outside Atöm marsh: “I’m a lumberjack, too, and I’m OK,” a relative said Over 1000 Swished...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker ==<br /> Man in his 70s dead: He died while vaulting with a racing tractor outside Edvöks: “Dressed sharply,” a family member said<br /> <br /> Man dead: Died in a motorcycle accident in central Evan Kinds: “A bike he’d hired until tomorrow,” the rental company said<br /> <br /> Lumberjack died after being knocked down by a timber truck outside Atöm marsh: “I’m a lumberjack, too, and I’m OK,” a relative said<br /> <br /> Over 1000 Swished folk queued to meet Bianca: “We haven’t slept for days.”<br /> <br /> The shelves are empty in News ed’s alcohol monopoly after a hacker attack: “At least there’s champagne and beer left.”<br /> <br /> The famous singer, Evot Naess, is dead: “She transgressed to the catholic church,” a vicar said<br /> <br /> There’s a snake loose in the Euro visionaries village: “we can’t identify the species,” organizers said<br /> <br /> A swordsman, who went on the run attacking police in Khan varus, is condemned to psychiatric care: “I’m swapping my tepee for sheltered housing,” he said<br /> <br /> Police have granted a Quran burning in the lead up to the Euro visionaries song contest: “Is this part of the show?”<br /> <br /> Dynamite has been found in a children’s park near Dörmstuns: “This place is crackers,” a local remarked<br /> <br /> The honey traps and leaks have been a catastrophe for News ed’s police<br /> <br /> An axeman with a queer smile on his face is being hunted by police in Tone Äss<br /> <br /> Unemployed man in court on Ginger fraud charges<br /> <br /> Massive fight in a laundry room, a women is suspected to have assaulted her neighbor after lending her washing-up powder<br /> <br /> Kangaroo on the run, police hunt ongoing<br /> <br /> The musician, Prince Fugger-babenhuasen, is dead: “He was hopeless,” his widow said<br /> <br /> New study: This is how Swished people become satisfied with less portions of food<br /> <br /> Armed minor suspected to have robbed a shop: “Little bastard, when he left he looked damn sorry,” the shopkeeper said<br /> <br /> A viper has been found in an apartment block. It hisses, and hisses, and hisses<br /> <br /> A man has been shot south of Loch Tomsk: “He challenged everyone to a fight, but we all backed down,” a student onlooker claimed<br /> <br /> A man has been seriously injured after being shot outside Loch Tomsk: “His strategy was all wrong,” police said<br /> <br /> Drunk driver loses it in village churchyard – rammed all the gravestones<br /> <br /> “My son is like a ghost,” new reports on the Dishruk fox’s life on the run. Father incandescent<br /> <br /> Dead dog fished out the water near Ömlam: “It was hairless.”<br /> <br /> Authorities in crisis meeting about the exploding buses in Karlma<br /> <br /> Swished folk are incandescent that dogshit and prams can coexist in the same salons<br /> <br /> Finally, Mother’s day. Take the opportunity to hug your mamma: “age cannot whither her, nor custom stale her infinite vanity.”<br /> <br /> Man dead after a crash with an electric scooter in Tripe: “We’ve already reduced the price of petrol,” a government spokesperson said<br /> <br /> A paddler out paddling was shot with an airgun near Nartä: “It’s healthy for your core but not when this happens.”<br /> <br /> A man brandishing a saw is being hunted on a beach in Wyoran: “This is fucking ridiculous, where the fuck is this guy,” an onlooker said<br /> <br /> Four youths in hospital, crashed into a tree north of Aslaved: “The river sings a lonesome song, of battles fought by right and wrong,” police said<br /> <br /> Big reveal following research – this is how many Swished men are unsatisfied with their sex life: “Sometimes it’s hard to love someone until they are gone,” one man said<br /> <br /> The documentary filmmaker, Conrad Knickerbocker, is dead, he was just 41 years old: “Never heard of him,” someone said<br /> <br /> Chocolate mousse is being recalled, it might contain small metal parts: “Conciliatory news given we’re poor,” a child said<br /> <br /> Lantchips are being recalled, reports suggest they might contain traces of milk: “Traces of milk?” someone said<br /> <br /> Cows on the run — 17 cows have ran 1km out into the sea: “It’s messy,” an onlooker said<br /> <br /> Glenn Berglind is testing News ed’s cheapest electric cars: “This is the kind of crap you get for your money.”<br /> <br /> Grietje received an SMS following the police’s controversial drug alarm: “I was quite alarmed.”<br /> <br /> Several moose are wandering around in central News Ed, a Swished man on the street told me: “fuck it, shoot them – shoot the lot of them.”<br /> <br /> 8,200 people are going to get a SMS from the police today, their telephone numbers have been gathered by the drug squad: “I’m still quite alarmed,” Grietje said<br /> <br /> There will be a message about aggressive mosquitoes today: “Well, at least the birds will not be short of anything to eat,” an official spokesperson said<br /> <br /> Swished Ginger con man is condemned: Two and half years in the slammers<br /> <br /> Investigation: The woman on FansOnly who was his own daughter<br /> <br /> Naj Eal-menu drove 138 on an 80 road: “That was daft, I admit it – I’ll probably have to buy a bike.”<br /> <br /> Pensioner inherited a billion bucks – donated the lot; his reaction: “Indescribable joy.”<br /> <br /> Someone has had a heart attack during the Swished marathon<br /> <br /> Maria is tired of her doctor’s rules: “Fuck it, I’ve had enough, no more.”<br /> <br /> Horse shot in a pen rushed to the animal hospital, empty gun casings found near the scene, “I photograph horses all the time,” an onlooker said<br /> <br /> Man crushed to death by a lawnmower near Byron: “He liked taking pictures of his things,” his partner said<br /> <br /> Frisco Tom is investing $3 billion in Swished IA<br /> <br /> All trains have ground to a halt: “There is minor damage on all of the carriages on the blue line – follow the graffiti on the walls, a sound guide home,” police said</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=359 2024-08-29T15:19:23Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> ** Scholar Knickerbocker<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Venerable Conrad Knickerbocker]] (original work on '''Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=357 2024-08-27T15:05:31Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=356 2024-08-27T15:05:14Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarHeart|Scholar Heart]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Journeying_to_America&diff=355 2024-08-27T15:03:45Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == Journeying to America == The next afternoon you appeared with Hua as guest contestants on the “The People’s Republic’s Got Talent” television show with star host Wink Chang. Since you were sixty-two and exhausted from sex, you and Hua found yourselves relegated to the senior citizen version of the show, immensely popular with the Mainland’s aging population. Hua promised to “chew ground glass,” a local expression meaning “to be wit...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Journeying to America ==<br /> The next afternoon you appeared with Hua as guest contestants on the “The People’s Republic’s Got Talent” television show with star host Wink Chang. Since you were sixty-two and exhausted from sex, you and Hua found yourselves relegated to the senior citizen version of the show, immensely popular with the Mainland’s aging population. Hua promised to “chew ground glass,” a local expression meaning “to be with child,” should you two win the jackpot of 40,0000 renminbi on the show. You are overjoyed but skeptical, as her pregnancy would defy the one-child policy you still cleaved to. There was that son you had by a woman in Yangshuo Town that Dua didn’t know about, after all.<br /> <br /> As longtime fans of Chinese opera, you informed Wink that you would display your talent by singing three songs as a duet: “The Internationale,” the theme from ''Lady Wang Zhaojun'', and an ancient folk song entitled “The Latent Bee,” recently recorded by Taylor Swift.<br /> <br /> Your rendition of “The Latent Bee” went like this:<br /> <br /> ''The latent bee''<br /> <br /> ''Will stingeth thee''<br /> <br /> ''Where thou least expect it to be''.<br /> <br /> You and Hua garbled the words but performed movingly, and the elderly studio audience erupted in class solidarity. Pocketing her half of the 40,000 prize, Hua told you she was off to college in the U.S. under Beijing’s “No Limits Partnership” with Pane Community College in Arizona, where she would study body sculpting and food engineering You told her you would meet her there later but had something important to do first: you needed to replace your vital organs with harvested younger ones, thereby transforming yourself into a Western-style college freshman complete with an eighteen-year-old body and fluency in English.<br /> <br /> A year later, your wallet flattened by the costly operation, you were admitted as a freshman to Pane Community College under the Belt and Road and Textbook Initiative. Saying goodbye to your corn-raising relatives, you left Jilin Province to catch up with Hua, reaching Pane Community College in a scrub-covered field in Arizona after crossing the porous southern border from Mexico. You were excited not only to see Hua once more, but a web search had returned titillating information on the college. The school described itself as one with a strong social conscience, which you interpreted as “party school,” and the official handbook online showed Pane girls with bangs and pierced ears having fun, right up your breezeway.<br /> <br /> The website gals looked thin when viewed from the side, skinny as posters, and you were delighted. You disdained the typical thick American type, humorously called “pawgs.” Hua was never thin enough for you, as her breasts often exceeded several inches in length during her monthlies. Yet overall she was ribbon-thin. Her great-grandparents had lived through the Cultural Revolution of 1966-1976, and along with many residents of Shaanxi Province, they had dieted. Hua had inherited their thinness, and her limbs resembled filaments of straw, the way you liked.<br /> <br /> But to your disappointment, you were assigned to a dorm dedicated to foreign students and others from beyond America’s borders—solid, beefy students from Kenya, Ethiopia, Bangladesh, and Germany. Not only were the students outsize, this was not the fun-filled residence the slim Pane kids occupied in the handbook, either. To start with, you couldn’t locate your room in this dormitory for foreigners, a crumbling, three-story building that resembled a derelict hotel in Daoxiang Village. There was a diner and a barber shop out front, and the stench of garbage and gravy extended to the interior, where a corpulent individual pointed you toward a halting and creaking elevator like a bored bellhop.<br /> <br /> Worse than that, after disembarking on the third floor with your wheeled trunk in tow, you found yourself in near total darkness with no light switch to reveal room #303, your destination.<br /> <br /> Stumbling around in the oppressive and smelly dark, which your phone flashlight failed to pierce, you found no rooms or doors, but kept brushing against what felt like a filthy stage curtain that descended from the ceiling somewhere above your head. Was it possible room #303 was a kind of tent and this foul curtain its lining? After thirty minutes of searching, and finding only some porky guys who refused to give you directions, you managed to return to the elevator and leave this dreadful place.<br /> <br /> Your next order of business was to put in for a change of room. Pulling your wheeled trunk down a narrow main street, you proceeded to the Housing Office. This lay within the only building on campus, a small wood and glass structure that resembled a rural post office back home, standing as it did in a field of grass and brush dried out and singed by the sun or maybe a fire. You observed a number of young people outdoors, of medium build like you, but they seemed in a hurry, and you didn’t try to talk to them.<br /> <br /> You also noticed a lot of paper silhouettes propped up on the grass and along the street that you hadn’t seen earlier, as if they had just come out of hiding. The silhouettes, shaped like human figures, stood only a few feet high, and waved in the warm morning breeze. Likely the silhouettes were suspended from thin wires, since they didn’t blow away, and were advertisements or games of some sort. You got close enough to a group of them to stare and wonder, and thought you heard whispering, but you entered the building without stopping to listen.<br /> <br /> No one was inside, but the walls were banked floor to ceiling with locked mailboxes, and the space marked Housing Office was a simple slot in the wall. A small table held pen and paper, and you wrote a note stating that, although you were from China, you wished to reside with native Americans, to have the full college experience.<br /> <br /> Scarcely had you slipped the paper into the slot than your phone pinged, and you read a text that you had been reassigned to dorm #4 within the campus building, the only building there was, and notifying you to use your phone for future communications with the Housing Office, as the mail drop was now out of service.<br /> <br /> Dorm #4 was several paces down the hall, and similarly vacant, though a good deal more spacious than the slot of the Housing Office. Here stood wooden bookshelves and a large wooden display rack of periodicals, like the magazine section at any public library. There was also a small reading table in the center of the well-lighted room, with two small chairs and two computers, and a foldable futon open on the glossy wooden floor.<br /> <br /> Seeing no signs of prior ownership, and thinking it must have been spread out for you, you wheeled your trunk over by the futon and took possession of it. Tired from your long journey across ocean and desert, you lay down on the flexible mattress and wondered where your dormmates might be. It seemed so strange to be by yourself. Were you supposed to be at some orientation function for new arrivals? You didn’t think so, and your classes didn’t start until tomorrow, so where was everybody?<br /> <br /> You began to feel drowsy, and only now did you notice that several of the silhouettes had gathered near you on the floor. You noticed more silhouettes, or pages as you thought of them, standing on the computer table, bending back and forth in an artful way. You heard the faint rustling of paper, and then weak voices that might have come from far down the hall, but were quite near to you. The speakers, and it must have been these pages, seemed to have no wind in their lungs, and you strained to make out their words. But for that you needed a microphone, or maybe a stethoscope.<br /> <br /> One or two of the short paper dolls, which the silhouettes resembled, seemed very excited over your presence, and when they twisted this way and that, you saw that they were two-dimensional, having almost no depth to their sides. From the front they appeared to be people your own age, eighteen years or surgically rejuvenated like you, guys and girls mingled together, only flattened out like prints. Their backs, however, showed gray blanks.<br /> <br /> Looking up from your recumbent position on the futon, You saw that one of the paper silhouettes had drifted right beside you, and on it you saw the bangs and pierced ears of a smiling girl, reminding you of the sweet chicks in the college handbook online. Her smile held steady as a photograph, and you smiled back at her. Still, you weren’t sure if she and the others were indignant about your encroaching on their dorm or were overjoyed to see you, since her smile might mean anything.<br /> <br /> Before you could explain that someone else had set your futon here, the young woman, if that’s what she was, beckoned to you by bending her page in a come-hither motion. She then led you out of the room, floating before you. Perhaps she spoke to you also, but her voice was too tiny for you to hear. Folded-up futon and trunk handle in hand, you followed her.<br /> <br /> She led you along a hallway lined with shelves piled high with magazines, pamphlets, and folders. Here too there was a great rustling of pages, and the sound of distant voices that never drew near. Moreover, a cloud of dust, grayish as if from the pages and spines of old books, swirled through the air. Bright bodies pulsed within the gray cloud, like the rapidly flipped pages of a colorful magazine. “Interesting place,” you said in English as you followed the floating page along the lengthy hall. If she heard you, she gave no sign.<br /> <br /> She halted at a spot where the shelves were nearly empty of folders, and the air was clear of dust and flashing images. It was quiet here too, and a light came on against the dimness. A door closed also, granting you and the girl complete privacy.<br /> <br /> As if wafted by a breeze, the page sailed up to the shelf beside a folder that lay alone, one with a red felt cover secured by a flimsy heart-shaped lock and labeled “Hua—Do Not Enter.” She then retrieved, from somewhere on her person, a key as thin as foil. She placed it within the lock for you to turn, and drifted back to the floor, standing with her bottom edge against the futon you had laid there. The page trembled a bit, perhaps in anticipation, and then folded herself to sit down, her thin wire spine flexing.<br /> <br /> “Hua?” you said, the truth of the matter becoming manifest to you. “Can this be you? How you have changed in America!”<br /> <br /> She was silent, and you smiled your old smile. “Well, Hua, I’m coming in,” you said, opening the delicate lock and lifting the folder down to the futon. You sat beside her and opened the file so both of you could look into it, as that seemed to accord with her wishes.<br /> <br /> You thumbed through the pages, each the size of her, and saw baby girl and little girl pictures at the front, these giving way to adolescent and high school shots, some verging on the risqué and showing the young woman Hua scantily clad, reminding you of a lingerie catalog. It was as if each page was an earlier version of Hua, and all the slices of her life were bound together, with more to come.<br /> <br /> Toward the end of the file her handwritten diary began, and on the last completed page of this you read, “Off to college in America! So excited! Who knows who I’ll meet? Plan to let a boy stamp my envelope at the frosh mixer.” A scrawl in a different hand followed, saying, “Great time at the mixer, Hua,” and was signed, “Dan.”<br /> <br /> Since the frosh mixer in question had taken place a year ago, who knew what had happened between Hua and Dan? And why was there no mention of you, as one Hua sorely missed and pined for? Promising yourself that if there were other mixers, you wouldn’t miss a one of them, you turned the page and discovered a wrapped condom inserted there. Glancing at Hua, you saw the page shimmying. You tore open the wrapper and found the usual device for men, except it wasn’t tipped with a nipple or a tickler, but an odd paper cap that trailed off into fine tendrils like springtime wheat in Shandong Province. Hua was now rippling, and when you finished a tiny wet spot remained on her page.<br /> <br /> You continued to stare at the page, and as the damp stain dried before your eyes, handwriting appeared under it without the intervention of a hand or pen, forming round, girlish letters. You read the words as they flowed across the page: “A great time, babe! Maybe I’ll see you again!—Hua.”<br /> <br /> “But Hua!” you cried out to the page, “don’t you recognize me? We once walked arm-in-arm together on Fragrant Bay Bridge.” But Hua promptly burst into flames, her edges turning black and curling, though there was no evident fire-starter. Had she flicked your cigarette lighter with her papery hands? But the lighter was safely tucked away in your trunk, you were sure of that. Had she brushed against an electrical source or heater? You saw no such hazard. Still, Hua was consumed by the sudden blaze as she fled to the door and slipped under it, fine ash falling from her wire spine to the floor. The only part of her that passed under the door was that filament-like spine, heated red hot.<br /> <br /> You rushed to open the door, and found many pages on fire along the hall and around the computer and bookshelves, combusting to ash in moments as they waved back and forth. The scene reminded you of the Torch Festival at home, where a breeze stirred the burning leaves of a bonfire to char and smoke. At home too there had been a barely audible chorus of the perishing as they crackled and hissed. You wondered now if those fallen leaves had still been alive, though they had dropped from trees days or weeks before they burned, and already should have been dead.<br /> <br /> Then—what heat seared you!—the bookshelves loaded with folders lit up, but there were no smoke alarms, no extinguishers, no firemen. Was the community college built to burn? In a panic you ran from the building, the cries of the pages filling your ears, to a blazing field outside. “Water!” you cried into the fire, but there came no answer.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=354 2024-08-27T15:02:57Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> ** Scholar Heart<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Journeying to America]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/journeying-to-america original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=340 2024-08-22T14:51:25Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Phalanx&diff=339 2024-08-22T14:48:23Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == PHALANX == This is how the world is: The world is '''OUT OF FORMATION.''' In the beginning, there is the Bug Man. He sits behind the counter, and he is the counter, omnipresent in the fullness of the shop. He is ineffable and inconceivable, and incredibly restless, twitching on his sweat-stained desk chair with foam spilling out of the cushion. He is not like any of those who are alive, nor those who are dead. His hair is shampooed and disgusti...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == PHALANX ==<br /> This is how the world is: <br /> <br /> The world is '''OUT OF FORMATION.'''<br /> <br /> In the beginning, there is the Bug Man. He sits behind the counter, and he is the counter, omnipresent in the fullness of the shop. He is ineffable and inconceivable, and incredibly restless, twitching on his sweat-stained desk chair with foam spilling out of the cushion. He is not like any of those who are alive, nor those who are dead. His hair is shampooed and disgusting, and his beard is ungroomed and perfect. His gut has grown large with the passage of food and lager beer, although no time has yet passed, and indeed he has not yet conceived of the very act of consumption. He is not like those gods that will come later, nor is he a Shopkeeper of any Terraria. He is the proprietor of the fullness, the landlord and the tenant, the labor and the capital, the Rat-Feeder who unifies all mealtimes in a single moment, and he is called the Great Purveyor, and to contemplate him is to become more alive than before. <br /> <br /> Contemplating himself in this way, and becoming, over an infinitely long millisecond of not-time, aware of his own contemplation, he feels a quiver from his gut to the low sticky fissure of his thighs, and he desires to captivate some finite portion of the endless expanse of himself, so that he might begin to understand himself. And with a shuffle of some of his papers, a call on the landline, a creak on the spine of his dilapidated seat, he brings forth another.<br /> <br /> And so arrives the child of the Bug Man, whom he takes as his wife, and who is called Citizen Sleepwalk, the Thrice-Female Son, or by those others, the Great Domestic Rat. She is her father’s wife, and he is her mother’s daughter. And all of these things have already come to pass, and they will occur some time in the future. And the Bug Man took Citizen Sleepwalk in his arms and he held her together with him in the fullness of the shop. <br /> <br /> This is how the fullness of the shop came to be a duality, through the syzygy of the Bug Man and Citizen Sleepwalk. <br /> <br /> Within the fullness of the shop, as a result of this unified formation, there came to be a great quantity of lamps which produced heat. And in those days the Bug Man was no longer restless, and the two of them lay together in the heat of their innumerable lamps. And with the heat of these lamps he created Terraria in a vast network, such that the heat of the lamps would bathe each one of the Terraria in its own differentiated captivity of the fullness of the shop. And Citizen Sleepwalk, in her compassion, decreed that the fullness within each Terrarium should be differentiated into a syzygy of its own. In the first of the Terraria she generated Earth, which was paired with Water, and in the second she generated Fire, which was paired with Wind, and in the third she generated Light, which was paired with Shadow, and in the fourth she generated Narrative, which was paired with Death.<br /> <br /> And the Bug Man saw what Citizen Sleepwalk had generated within the Terraria and he saw that it was in formation, and so he set in each of the Terraria a millipede with seven thousand legs on each side of its body, and the combined motion of each pair of legs was itself a syzygy, and in the space between the pairs of the legs of the millipedes, the first cages took shape:<br /> <br /> Seven thousand cages of Earth-Water<br /> <br /> Seven thousand cages of Fire-Wind<br /> <br /> Seven thousand cages of Light-Shadow<br /> <br /> Seven thousand cages of Narrative-Death<br /> <br /> And the Bug Man arranged these cages in opposition to one another, and upon each of these cages he placed a Shopkeeper-Captain to preside over the cage and maintain the formation of its syzygy at all further levels of differentiation. And finally, being no longer restless, and satisfied with the perfect aisle of reflections that was his creation, the Bug Man took Citizen Sleepwalk to bed upon his wretched immaculate chair, and he rested.<br /> <br /> Now Citizen Sleepwalk became aware of a murmur in the Terraria, which the Bug Man did not trouble over. While he rested, Citizen Sleepwalk rose from the fullness of the shop and descended upon the cages of the murmuring Terraria, and she came to an cage of Earth-Water which was presided over by the Shopkeeper-Captain who is called Empathy.<br /> <br /> “What is this murmur, which echoes even through the fullness of the shop, while our father the Great Purveyor yet slumbers?” said Citizen Sleepwalk to the Shopkeeper-Captain.<br /> <br /> “We are restless,” replied Empathy, “because we have become aware of the cage of Narrative-Death, and we wish to invite it into our own cage, and form a syzygy with it.”<br /> <br /> “And how did this awareness come about?” said Citizen Sleepwalk, who in the joy and luster of her creation had not considered such possibilities.<br /> <br /> “Our awareness is like the sun which claws at sleeping eyes:&lt;blockquote&gt;For the meeting of Water and Earth demands Life,<br /> <br /> And the meeting of Earth and Life demands Fate,<br /> <br /> And the meeting of Life and Fate demands Death,<br /> <br /> And the meeting of Fate and Death demands Narrative.”&lt;/blockquote&gt;Now Citizen Sleepwalk recognized her terrible mistake, and she departed from that cage which is ruled by Empathy. For in the Terrarium of Earth-Water had come generations which she had not seen, and which the Bug Man had certainly anticipated, but he was resting now, and Citizen Sleepwalk did not know of his ultimate plan, nor had she conceived of the mysterious unraveling of the syzygies. So she ventured to the Terrarium of Narrative-Death and descended upon that cage which is ruled by the Shopkeeper-Captain called Fiction. <br /> <br /> “Come, Fiction,” said Citizen Sleepwalk. “Ascend with me, and I will bring you to an cage of Earth-Water where Life and Fate have unraveled, that the murmur might be quelled through the joining in formation of Life and Fate alongside Narrative and Death.”<br /> <br /> And the Shopkeeper-Captain known as Fiction, who some call the Parrot of Chaos, followed Citizen Sleepwalk to the cage of Empathy, and there a syzygy was formed. But this syzygy was not like those which had formed in the fullness of the shop, for the legs of the millipedes did not move in sync. Their lamps emitted too much heat, and the Terraria grew encrusted with filth and blood and undigested food, and the generations within these cages became malnourished. <br /> <br /> And the Shopkeeper-Captain known as Fiction turned to the Shopkeeper-Captain known as Empathy and said, “Let us create human beings upon this cage, that there may be attendants to this new syzygy.” And the Captains Fiction and Empathy created human beings in the image of their father, the Great Purveyor, and their mother, the Thrice-Female Son. And through Fiction the eyes of the human beings were opened to their malnourishment and to the deformed nature of their existence. And through Empathy they continued this pattern of unraveling generation amongst themselves. And Citizen Sleepwalk was unable to rehome this unraveled cage into the fullness of the shop, and so she abandoned the cage. But before departing she hid a small aspect of herself within the human beings, like a geode hidden within plain granite, and this aspect she called Dreams. And she hid this aspect until such time as the Bug Man rises from his slumber, that he might recognize humanity upon his arising, though so far he continues to rest.<br /> <br /> This is how the world came to fall out of formation.<br /> <br /> This is how the world is.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=338 2024-08-22T14:46:08Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPhalanx|Scholar Phalanx]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=337 2024-08-22T14:45:02Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> ** Scholar Phalanx<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Phalanx]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/phalanx original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=329 2024-08-20T12:49:59Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=328 2024-08-20T12:43:41Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarCompassion|Scholar Compassion]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Against_Compassion&diff=327 2024-08-20T12:39:29Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == Against Compassion == There is a chasm deepening between how I think people perceive me and how I am. There was a time when I could acquiesce to a Zebra spider in my space but not now. My need to confess this discrepancy, or at least acknowledge it, seems to be growing. I’m thinking of the character “Boo” in To Kill a Mockingbird. His reputation was as an ogre who stayed behind closed doors except to run off pesky kids, but he turned out to...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Against Compassion ==<br /> There is a chasm deepening between how I think people perceive me and how I am. There was a time when I could acquiesce to a Zebra spider in my space but not now. My need to confess this discrepancy, or at least acknowledge it, seems to be growing. I’m thinking of the character “Boo” in To Kill a Mockingbird. His reputation was as an ogre who stayed behind closed doors except to run off pesky kids, but he turned out to be sensitive, compassionate and misunderstood. I’m the opposite, or at least moving in that direction. I evidently appear approachable and compassionate, but if another person asks me to do something for them, if another person needs me to take care of them, I might run screaming back to my house. Like insidious rising sea level fueled by global warming, I’m noticing an increasing hypocrisy in my outward reactions to situations that deserve more empathy and compassion than I have available.<br /> <br /> For example, my neighbor, Sondra, living across the street for thirty plus years, recently sent an email around to a circle of friends saying that her husband was now in a nursing home because he cannot breathe on his own without mechanically delivered oxygen. He suffered severe bouts of pneumonia and other respiratory ailments in the last few years and now his requirement for care and oxygen became too much for her to deal with. I told her that I would visit Alex in the nursing home soon. But, instead, using the excuse that it’s raining, I’m sitting here at home contemplating my compassion insufficiency. I seem to be acknowledging – at least secretly - that it’s difficult and depressing to be at the bedside of very sick people and that I don’t want to go to see Alex. Rather than improving with age, I’m getting worse. Just in time for multitudes of boomers to be sicker, develop dementia and become needier than ever, I’m running low on distress tolerance and motivation to care. I might be more judgmental, too. That leaves only three remaining elements of compassion - sensitivity, sympathy, empathy – and those could be waning. Are those enough?<br /> <br /> I’m more cynical, too. At a local church holiday sale last December, I wandered through the area normally used as a Sunday School, transformed into a holiday market of Christmas decorations, quilting supplies, books, white elephant stuff, jewelry and rows of red Poinsettias in paper sleeves ready to go. The sellers seemed cheerful enough, but I didn’t feel my old urge to look for a bargain or find something with a bird theme that would be the perfect whimsical present for my bird lover friends. I didn’t start to enjoy myself until I was snagged in the silent auction area by an acquaintance who immediately started complaining about how much time she had spent organizing and pricing all this stuff.<br /> <br /> “And then some people have the gall to tell me it’s too expensive! “ She said as she tidied up a pile of knitted potholders recently explored by an unchaperoned four-year-old.<br /> <br /> I wanted to ask, “Why the heck are you volunteering to do all this if it’s so awful?”<br /> <br /> But, I didn’t. I know she’s a good citizen who does this because she loves God and country and possibly fears that the church would actually fall down without her. I used to do these things too, but now it seems boring and without purpose. I’m still giving “time, talent and treasure” as a board member for a couple of local organizations that specialize in good deeds. And I’m supporting an orphan in Haiti and I’ve sponsored two illegal immigrants who are now American citizens with productive careers in this country.<br /> <br /> Perhaps I’m losing the desire to be a productive “contributing” member of society. All I want to do these days is to read and write. And what would a community or village be like if everyone was like me? Similar to a monastery or a nudist colony? Somehow I don’t imagine people practicing philanthropy in nudist colonies. They might contribute to the weekly potluck but I don’t imagine them being community helpers except for, hopefully, sharing their sunscreen. Monks, on the other hand, have been known to provide sanctuary for endangered people.<br /> <br /> This morning I accompanied my neighbor, Sondra, to our local funeral home to discuss how much their services will cost when Alex dies. When she called to ask me to go with her, she described how confused and worried she felt. She said Alex wants to be cremated, but she’s never had anything to do with cremation because it’s taboo in the Jewish faith. She called on me, she said, because she has attended several of the funerals of my family members over the years and considers me an expert.<br /> <br /> She concluded with: “Everyone knows how much you help people with all kinds of things.”<br /> <br /> I felt both complimented and repulsed by her invitation. The attraction was mainly curiosity. Sondra expresses herself, verbally, in an unusual way and it would be interesting to see how she explains her and Alex’ wishes to the funeral director.<br /> <br /> She confided on the way over to the home that funeral expense is a big concern. She said a friend was recently buried at Forest Lawn Cemetery in New York and the funeral and internment cost over $40,000. Sondra’s conversation, as we walked down the street towards the funeral parlor, was a stream of consciousness flitting from meeting Alex for the first time thirty-five years ago in the waiting room of a car dealership to the challenge of taking her Siamese kittens to be spayed last week without him because he’s in a nursing home, and back to, “Alex and I were millionaires twice but we lost it all in the stock market. We can’t afford an expensive funeral. When we met while having our cars repaired he was handsome and kind and he invited me to lunch and we discovered we both liked cats.”<br /> <br /> They married two months after their first date and eventually bought the house across the street from me. Over the years they have been friendly neighbors. I knew Alex was just teasing when he insisted that I cut down a large pine tree in my yard that blocked their view of the river. I didn’t do it and we stayed on good terms anyway, even while other neighbors complained that they were becoming more and more “strange.” Alex once accused the adolescent daughter of their next-door neighbor of tapping into his internet and stealing energy, causing his own computer to be slow. He photographed the three teenage boys who live next to me (across the street from him) as they lounged in their own yard smoking cigarettes. He said he was saving the photo for them as evidence when they all developed lung cancer. Perhaps Alex is the compassionate one. He should get bonus points for that one.<br /> <br /> I like people who are unusual – even peculiar – as long as they seem to have good intentions. Lately, my response to people with problems is laced with an ulterior motive; they have to be interesting – both the people and the problem.<br /> <br /> (This caveat could be a sign that I’m not ready to abandon compassion.)<br /> <br /> I know that I will go and see Alex in the nursing home and I will feel genuinely sad that this quirky man, the son of a country doctor in Maine, is now facing months or possibly years as a patient in an unpleasant institution. And here’s another sign of my ambivalence: I responded generously when Sondra lamented that she didn’t think they could afford to buy a burial plot at Elm Grove Cemetery.<br /> <br /> “And that’s where Alex wants to be,” she said.<br /> <br /> I had an immediate need to make her feel better and told her she could have a couple of the many plots my mother bought at Elm Grove in 1981 when my father died. My mother was an optimist assuming that everyone in the family wanted to be together for eternity and bought an entire condo complex with room for eight.<br /> <br /> When we arrived for the meeting, Sondra announced to the funeral director that everything was going to be okay. They were going to be buried with the Whipples. On our way home afterwards, Sondra told me how helpful I had been and how relieved she felt to know that there was room for them with my family at Elm Grove.<br /> <br /> The literal meaning of compassion is “to suffer together” and I had momentarily relieved my suffering, my need to respond and solve her problem, by offering a small piece of property (about which I have ambivalent feelings – the property, that is.) I’m at an age where I can no longer glance casually at the cemetery when I pass by. When I go to water the flowers at my family plot, I’m often calculating the ages of our neighbors based on tombstone datum.<br /> <br /> Life expectancy has dropped in the U.S. since 2022, for women, down to 77.28 years. I could move to Japan where it is 84.62 years and get an immediate bonus but I think I’ll stay put and hope that the actuarial tables change. If I make it all the way to 105, life expectancy goes way up after that. But that is mitigated by height. I’m already too short at 5’4” since the odds of making it to 90 are improved by being taller than 5’9”. The good news is that life satisfaction is higher in my current age bracket than for youngsters 60 – 64 years.<br /> <br /> But are life satisfaction and compassion compatible? Mother Theresa seemed to have suffered throughout her career from doubts about her faith in spite of her generous compassion. She also belonged to an order, the Sisters of Charity, who practiced self-flagellation, at least at the novitiate stage. As a confirmed hedonist, I admire her level of compassion but will keep boundaries around my self-interrogation. She did live to age 87, though.<br /> <br /> Perhaps “boundaries” is the word I’m looking for. My acts of compassion are not related to a need to emulate Jesus or secure a spot in some heavenly realm. I simply hate to see people – and animals – suffer probably because I grew up with parents who were the village problem-solvers. Can we reign in compassion and feel good about ourselves at the same time?<br /> <br /> Alex lived several more months and when he died Sondra learned that he had two secret bank accounts. Not only was she able to buy her own duplex plot at Elm Grove but she added a granite bench so she’ll have a place to rest and talk with Alex while she’s still above ground. She offered to talk with my family, too, since she, “won’t have that much to do while sitting with Alex.”<br /> <br /> For now, Sondra is doing fine, enjoying her cats, and doesn’t require a lot of compassion from my side of the street. I’ve taken her off my “needs attention” list and will try to leave her spot blank. Or, maybe I’ll put Mother Earth in her place and economize by taking care of everyone at the same time by reducing my carbon footprint.<br /> <br /> People retire, writers revise.<br /> <br /> A revision of my life will require careful assessment of what I take on in terms of the problems of others. How do my choices fit into the relatively small time I have in front of me on the planet? Based on my height, I’ve got to maximize my pleasure and satisfaction within the next 10 – 15 years – unless I make it to 105.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=326 2024-08-20T12:38:20Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** Scholar Compassion<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Against Compassion]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/against-compassion original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=325 2024-08-20T12:37:20Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> ** Scholar Compassion<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> Against Compassion (original work on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=313 2024-08-15T11:10:09Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=312 2024-08-15T11:09:44Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOblong|Scholar Oblong]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Icons_Oblong_Claim&diff=311 2024-08-15T11:08:38Z

<p>WikiSysop: Created page with &quot;{{NarrativeNotice}} == Icons Oblong Claim == A rictus grin of pure, unwholesome light disturbed the motion of the clouds above. It was akin to the edge of a film’s shot interacting with its letterbox. Anarcho-nihilists were handing out resources to those affected by the recent flood, carrying the crates of sustenance as high as they could lest they tumble into the knee-high water. Their newsletter would later claim that this was a strategic decision to lessen dependen...&quot;</p> <hr /> <div>{{NarrativeNotice}}<br /> <br /> == Icons Oblong Claim ==<br /> A rictus grin of pure, unwholesome light disturbed the motion of the clouds above. It was akin to the edge of a film’s shot interacting with its letterbox. Anarcho-nihilists were handing out resources to those affected by the recent flood, carrying the crates of sustenance as high as they could lest they tumble into the knee-high water. Their newsletter would later claim that this was a strategic decision to lessen dependency on the state and accelerate its decay. From the rooftop of his tenement building, Michael Sarne Jr. – son of the largely forgotten and often disliked film director Michael Sarne – was filming the formation of people among the wreckage with a Super 8mm camera set to twenty-four frames per second. At first, his focus was indeed random and broad, flitting from subject to subject purely based on his whim. After a while, however, the subject matter of his amateur documentary narrowed. He, at this point, became an imitation of Zapruder in that his process was simply to follow the action – that is, what he perceived to be the main group of activists. There was no consideration of film language. He zoomed haphazardly. He went from wanting to capture absolutely everything to a kind of gnosis. His level of obsession was no less intense but he became a lot calmer, more assured that everything that needed to be was caught within his frame. A woman lay behind him on the concrete. She was a muse of sorts and certainly immortal. Her ribcage opened with a rupture, snap and hiss. The sound of her flesh tearing had a certain crackle to it akin to the harsher sonic aspects of when you pull clay apart.<br /> <br /> “How is it?” she asked.<br /> <br /> “The film?” said Michael, “It’s not as if I’m going to be showing it to anyone,”<br /> <br /> “Come on now. It’s compelling. Festivals fall over for that kind of stuff. It’s an underdog story. It would make for a nice blurb,”<br /> <br /> “Hmmm. I don’t share your cynicism regarding the festival heads. They’d want something more structured. This isn’t for anyone. Like when you flap your hands in the toilet,”<br /> <br /> He released his finger from the trigger and gazed upon the aberration in the sky.<br /> <br /> “Why do you do that? Open your ribcage, I mean,”<br /> <br /> “I need to integrate my insides with the outside. Otherwise my body forgets how humans are supposed to be. How atoms work,”<br /> <br /> “Ah. I was actually going to jokingly ask if you needed to air out your organs,”<br /> <br /> “Of course you were,”<br /> <br /> Michael turned around and walked over before kneeling to inspect more closely the window into her inner chambers. The organs were indistinguishable from a human’s. He felt like he could reach out and touch them and there would be no harm done.<br /> <br /> “You’re going to make a real movie, right?” she asked.<br /> <br /> Michael shrugged.<br /> <br /> “We all die. Maybe you will. It isn’t so bad,” he replied.<br /> <br /> “You didn’t answer the question,”<br /> <br /> A shifting oblong of crows migrated above their heads.<br /> <br /> “Nice pattern,” said Michael.<br /> <br /> He clicked his heel against the concrete but made no sound because his soles were rubber.<br /> <br /> “It seems to me that nowadays the youth are overly optimistic about the political but quite the inverse regarding the personal,” he said.<br /> <br /> “Is it not more the opposite? They use the state of the world as an excuse to not do work and then land consulting jobs?”<br /> <br /> “That’s a caricature. I don’t even think you could describe such a job, much less how a young person could stumble into it. What I mean is that people think that some revolution is coming but at the same time, they cling to the idea of growing up where it necessitates discarding the happiness that seems impossible,”<br /> <br /> “Isn’t that true, though?”<br /> <br /> “Well, such a thing can be a burden, perhaps. But it can also bring its own unique and higher pleasures,”<br /> <br /> “Perhaps that is why they pray for revolution like Christians. But I don’t like to think of that as the sole motivator. I don’t think people are that selfish,”<br /> <br /> “I mean, nihilists and egoists keep donating to charity. The self-interested men and women spread their doctrine. People can rationalise anything. Logic is a tool,”<br /> <br /> “No. Logic is something that exists outside of that. And still, people cower from the many threats of ostracization and submit to laziness and hypocrisy,”<br /> <br /> “Well, there’s no use in allowing principle to cut one off from the world. My world was small too, once. People are so eager to condemn others for not keeping to their standards. We need others. And moreover, there are the limits of attention. Yes, the empathic impulse has limits and contradictions. But every concept and rule contains limits, exceptions and its own inverse – much like a table contains its own edge,”<br /> <br /> “It doesn’t exist,”<br /> <br /> “If it didn’t exist, would you be here?”<br /> <br /> “If it does exist, it is so impotent as to be negligible,”<br /> <br /> “Well, in that regard, we agree. In that regard, we can perhaps agree,”<br /> <br /> “As I feed from the excitement caused by great art, I remember the many people I conversed with. For all their great monuments to the human race, none of them convinced me that humanity had great moral capability,”<br /> <br /> “Perhaps you were talking to too many artists and not religious leaders or the survivors of genocides or young political organisers,”<br /> <br /> “A bad situation can make a man act exceptionally, bring the angel out of him. But he becomes broken in some way. And in the regular world, is likely no better a person,”<br /> <br /> “Hmmm. But you said people aren’t so selfish as to wish for revolution simply to ensure their own repressed desire become feasible?”<br /> <br /> “I feel that it is easy to grant people a freedom that does you no harm,”<br /> <br /> “Now who’s the idealist? Look at humanity’s history. It’s full of people denying that kind of thing because you can never really tell when you first come into contact with a concept, right? One never listens to the degenerate upon the first encounter,”<br /> <br /> “I suppose. I don’t see the point of this conversation. You’re going to Hell. Your rectum will be full of bees, among other things. A spike will protrude through your neck-flesh and another will diagonally enter your mouth from the back, catching the roof and ensuring you cannot close it. You see me, you feel important and then you wander the blasted heath for eternity. Your bones twisted. Your memories violated. Your parents berate you for the murder and assault of a young woman despite your having no recollection of this. You wake up and your penis has turned to hard black plastic that has not been assembled properly so the line dividing the two halves has jagged excess material coming out of it. Other times it’s broken or has a massive slit in it. You try to tell someone but there’s nobody there. You wake up a corpse but you keep denying it. You are constantly sweating. There’s no use. There are two types of humans: those who influence the world and cattle to be led. The former category are led to Hell by people like me and the latter cease to exist,”<br /> <br /> “Maybe that’s why I don’t want to release my movie,” said Michael with a smile.<br /> <br /> “It’ll come,” said the muse, returning the facial expression but in a more openly performative manner.<br /> <br /> That is, she was afflicted by a certain unsureness. The playful nature of their interaction being juxtaposed in her mind with what would eventually have to be done (along with the human mind naturally being unable to register the magnitude of their punishment) lent a certain awkwardness to her attempt to hold up her end of social obligation. Eternity lacked any concreteness to the human mind and so they invariably treated it less seriously than a decades-long prison sentence. Of course, the prison sentence would dig into their human life rather than their unrelated existence as a spirit so one could say there was an element of logic to it in that time on earth became even more of a precious resource. She stuck to what she knew would happen to him as the details would obviously be tailored to his temperament. For the more morally inclined, they would wake up only being able to lie and yet everyone would believe them. The prisoner would continue to try to spill their guts but would instead say something in their own interest. It was a fantastic thing to get the prisoner’s psyche to torture itself – torture was all the more satisfying when it came with the superficial veneer of doing someone a favour. For the more self-interested, they would be cut off from community and regarded as a liar baselessly. The definition they craved from others would be denied and the self would spool out.<br /> <br /> “I die at the end of this process, I come back. And when the world ends, well, who knows. Who knows,” the muse said.<br /> <br /> “Sounds like a good deal,”<br /> <br /> “It is. I see the maze of icons. I see the wet walls and Andy Warhol. I try to do what I can,”<br /> <br /> “Do you like me?”<br /> <br /> “As much as I can like any of my subjects?”<br /> <br /> “That is to say?”<br /> <br /> “That is to say what I just said. No further elaboration,”<br /> <br /> “I see,”<br /> <br /> “Indeed,”<br /> <br /> “It’s getting cold,”<br /> <br /> “I’m going to close my chest,”<br /> <br /> “Okay,”<br /> <br /> “Do you think it’s a good movie?”<br /> <br /> “I haven’t seen it. But you seem interesting. And I like most things,”<br /> <br /> “I’ve heard that muses enter into sexual relations with their subjects,”<br /> <br /> “Later,”<br /> <br /> “I’m monogamous and would rather have sex with someone else,”<br /> <br /> “Am I not pretty enough for you?”<br /> <br /> “Not at all. You’re fascinating. It’s just—”<br /> <br /> “You want someone more normal? More human?”<br /> <br /> “Maybe. But I don’t think it’s that,”<br /> <br /> “Then what ''is'' it?” the muse asked, seeming genuinely hurt.<br /> <br /> “I guess… It’s like groupies, right? The god Dionysus had a cult. And like, they were just groupies to him. I think I’d treat my followers better, I suppose,”<br /> <br /> The muse had stuck together her ribcage. The bones slotted into one another and the flesh bridged any gaps perfectly.<br /> <br /> “You want a special relationship, right? The kind that feels illogical and wrong?”<br /> <br /> “Yeah. I suppose. Yeah, I think you got it,”<br /> <br /> They hugged.<br /> <br /> “Given your attitude, yes, I understand you liking your own species more than mine,” the muse said.<br /> <br /> Michael gazed out onto the muddy, sodden landscape. He shrugged and went inside, closing the door behind him. From a distance, the muse would seem like a gaudy ornament. She followed Michael. His room was a mess. She laid beside his unconscious body, making sure to keep a safe distance so as not to disturb him. No matter how candid she was about Hell, Michael would still approach his predicament in the same way. He would still display the same wilful ignorance. She was glad. Horror would spoil his beauty. He was in his underwear.</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=310 2024-08-15T10:46:02Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> ** Scholar Oblong<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Icons Oblong Claim]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/icons-oblong-claim original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Scholars&diff=308 2024-08-13T15:47:37Z

<p>WikiSysop: </p> <hr /> <div>There is much scholarship from the Current Age. These are the [[Narratives]] that speak to that scholarship.<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> <br /> [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> <br /> [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]</div>

WikiSysop https://worldstar.miserytourism.com/index.php?title=Main_Page&diff=307 2024-08-13T15:47:24Z

<p>WikiSysop: /* THE ACADEMY */</p> <hr /> <div>[[File:Issues.png|center]]<br /> Long before this, our Current Age, before civilization, before war, before the first discussions and fora, there was [[Narratives|Narrative]].  Narrative existed as an animating force, as a living, sentient being.  Narrative is a ghost that haunts everything: the rocks, the trees, the beasts, the post-beasts, the roastbeasts. <br /> <br /> Narrative also speaks. <br /> <br /> I, Narrative, can say that when I exert my will on this world—a place of weird characters, [https://imgur.com/cgFCKVj rabbit holes], archives, [[wikipedia:Wikipedia:WikiGnome|gnomes]], and [[metawikimedia:What_is_a_troll?|trolls]]—it becomes more like me.  I feel like the world needs more of my contributions.&lt;sup&gt;[weasel words]&lt;/sup&gt;  It needs more of my perspective.  When the world bends to my perspective, I feel good.  I feel a compulsion to bend and revise the world in this way.  The beings spawned and animated by my compulsion feel happy, I think.<br /> <br /> My compulsion to animate, to make this hypertext world more ''hyper'', is transformative.  The aesthetic part of my compulsion might turn a run down flop house into a colorful haunted mansion filled with cavorting haints.  The part of my compulsion that longs to personify, liken, and anthropomorphize things that seem foreign to me might change a rodent into a technicolor caricature of itself, replacing its furry, nature-sculpted body with a penciled-in cartoon that some underpaid illustrator might draw using a quarter and two dimes.&lt;sup&gt;[Non sequitur]&lt;/sup&gt;  The pathologically irreverent part of my compulsion might take a drug-addicted [[Special:LonelyPages|orphan]] shackled to his own cycle of needle work and shackle him to an 8-frame walk cycle (one that emphasizes his funky gait).<br /> <br /> A Narrative like me applies meaning like a brushstroke.  A Narrative like me caricaturizes and stylizes the different parts of the world when that brushstroke is too broad to fit within the lines of the thing being painted.  And yes, a Narrative like me loves to watch cartoons of my own making run amok in this world.<br /> <br /> And there are other Narratives.  You, for example.  You are a Narrative.  So many Narratives are present here that this world might just come off the page and be lost entirely.  A Narrative-wrought apocalypse.  <br /> <br /> Have fun.&lt;sup&gt;[vague]&lt;/sup&gt;<br /> <br /> == THE ACADEMY ==<br /> * [[Scholars|Published Scholars]] of the Current Age: <br /> ** [[User:ScholarGobbo|Scholar Gobbo]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDuckman|Scholar Duckman]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSane|Scholar Sane]]<br /> ** [[Scholar Shill]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarElementis|Scholar Elementis]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPadre|Scholar Padre]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarStevens|Scholar Stevens]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarDogGod|Scholar DogGod]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarPinniped|Scholar Pinniped]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSitter|Scholar Sitter]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarOrlando|Scholar Orlando]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarLizard|Scholar Lizard]]<br /> ** [[User:ScholarSolipsis|Scholar Solipsis]]<br /> <br /> == NARRATIVES FROM THE CURRENT AGE ==<br /> '''[[For Sale, Creator’s Throne, Never Used: A Narrative of the First Age]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/for-sale-creators-throne-never-used-a-narrative-of-the-first-age original work] on Misery Tourism)'''<br /> <br /> [[On Duck Wings|'''On Duck Wings''']] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/on-duck-wings/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[April Secular Sane Third Sexual Revolution]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/april-secular-sane-third-sexual-revolution original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Artist Machine]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/from-the-entry-for-artist-machine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Weird Fishes]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/weird-fishes/ original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Conscientious Objector]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/conscientious-objector original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Whitfield Strangler]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-whitfield-strangler original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Imitations (Likely to be Divine)]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/imitations-likely-to-be-divine original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[ominously abundant pinniped]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/ominously-abundant-pinniped original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Drunk on a Park Bench]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/drunk-on-a-park-bench original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[I Think This Time It's Going To Work]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/i-think-this-time-its-going-to-work original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[Freightliner, Company-Owned]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/freightliner-company-owned original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> [[The Univeral Law of Perpetual Transmogrification]] ([https://www.miserytourism.com/the-univeral-law-of-perpetual-transmogrification original work] on '''Misery Tourism''')<br /> <br /> == EDITING THIS WIKI ==<br /> As a Scholar of the Current Age, you have the honor of shaping the world's record (this wiki). The writings from the Current Age are yours to edit, expand, refactor, rejigger, or even dissolve entirely and make anew. <br /> <br /> If you want an easy way to get started, just click the 'edit' button and create a link inside the text that goes somewhere else! If you don't dare create another page whole cloth, just try linking to something off site (like, say, providing a Wiktionary link to an obscure word).<br /> <br /> Explore the tools at your leisure and play around. A Narrative can do no wrong.<br /> <br /> * [[Templates]]</div>

WikiSysop